


Next Gen Interface

by d2fmeasurement



Category: Silicon Valley (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-09
Updated: 2015-05-09
Packaged: 2018-03-29 16:26:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3902992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d2fmeasurement/pseuds/d2fmeasurement
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dinesh and Gilfoyle's experience with Richard and Jared's daughter makes them re-evaluate whether they should have children of their own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Next Gen Interface

“I don’t know how we’re going to fake interest in this,” Dinesh said as Gilfoyle pulled into Richard and Jared’s driveway. “I know Richard and Jared are our friends--”

  
“That’s generous,” Gilfoyle interjected.

  
“--but it’s just going to be...’ooh a baby. Just like every other baby in the world but everyone has to act like they’re special. Congratulations.’”

  
Gilfoyle laughed a little and smiled at Dinesh affectionately, thinking of how he could’ve ended up with some sentimental, emotional person who always made him feel guilty for his own apathy. He parked the car, then pulled Dinesh into a kiss. “I’m so glad I married you,” he told him.

  
When they knocked on the door, Jared was wearing a bjorn with no baby in it.

  
Gilfoyle tilted his head and then turned to Dinesh. “So, Jared’s biological clock is ticking so hard he’s gone completely off the deep end...”

  
“What?” Jared asked. He looked down and laughed. “Oh, that’s very amusing, but no. There’s a real baby. Richard has her. I just forgot to take this off. Come in.”

  
“It does look right on you,” Dinesh said.

  
“Yeah,” Gilfoyle agreed. “You’ve always had a dad vibe.”

  
When they were inside, Richard grinned at them. “Hey, guys. This is Melissa.”

  
Gilfoyle and Dinesh both frowned. “That’s unfortunate,” Dinesh said.

  
“You guys are named Bertram and Dinesh,” Richard said defensively as he rocked Melissa.

  
“That’s fair,” Gilfoyle said.

  
At the same time, Dinesh said, “Dinesh is a perfectly good name, racist.”

  
“Do you guys want to hold her?” Jared asked.

  
“Making us fawn over your baby before you’ve even offered us coffee. You’ve already made your full transformation into nightmare parents,” Gilfoyle said.

  
“I’m sorry. Let me make you some coffee,” Jared said, going to the kitchen.

  
Gilfoyle sat down next to Richard and said, “Yeah, of course I want to hold your baby.”

  
Richard carefully gave Melissa to Gilfoyle. Dinesh watched curiously. Seeing Gilfoyle with a baby was definitely weird.

  
“Hey, Melissa,” Gilfoyle said in his normal voice. “How’s it going?... I’m good, too. I mean, not just-got-adopted-by-doting-billionaires good, but I’m good.” He rubbed her back and said, “You seem nice.”

  
Richard felt a little weird watching Gilfoyle have a casual conversation with his baby daughter, but he decided that seeing Gilfoyle use a baby talk voice would be way weirder.

  
Jared returned with two mugs of coffee. After he’d given one to Dinesh, he said, “Gilfoyle, your coffee’s ready.”

  
“Just set it aside, I’m not done holding your baby,” Gilfoyle said.

 

 

At the end of brunch, Dinesh asked Gilfoyle, “Are you ready to go?”

  
Gilfoyle reluctantly said, “Yeah, okay.” He looked at Melissa and asked, “You want to go back to your daddy? Which one?...They’re both freakishly thin, you have to be more specific.”

  
“I can take her,” Jared said, reaching his arms out.

 

 

 

That night when Dinesh and Gilfoyle were getting into bed, Dinesh said, “You seemed to like that baby a lot.”

  
“Yeah, she’s cool. You can really tell she doesn’t have Jared’s and Richard’s genes making her a fucking loser.”

  
Dinesh was taken aback for a second, although he was also pretty relieved to see the return of his Gilfoyle instead of the lovey-dovey baby holding Gilfoyle.

  
Gilfoyle wrapped an arm around Dinesh and asked him, “Do you ever think about having kids?”

  
Dinesh laughed. When he saw that Gilfoyle was serious, he tilted his head. “...do you?”

  
Gilfoyle thought about it. “I’ve always been too scared. I mean, when I think about the whole idea of parenthood, I just think about how shitty my parents were and feel terrified of ever fucking someone else up that badly. You know, they say everyone turns into their parents, so I’ve always had this fear that, you know, the instant my kid is in my arms, something in my innate nature will make me like them. But...I don’t know. I don’t think it has to be that way.”

  
Dinesh awkwardly laid there in Gilfoyle’s arms, feeling guilty about the fact that after years of marriage, he still felt uncomfortable when Gilfoyle got emotional.

Gilfoyle squeezed him and said, “So? What about you? Do you ever think about having kids?”

  
“I mean, I always assumed I would,” he said.

  
“You did? What changed?” Gilfoyle asked.

  
“Well...you know...”

  
Gilfoyle was genuinely clueless until he saw how guilty Dinesh looked. “What changed is that you ended up married to me,” Gilfoyle said. “Okay.”

  
“Look, you know I love the way you are, but--”

  
“Babe. Nothing good could follow that,” Gilfoyle said.

  
“So...are you okay or...”

  
“Yeah,” Gilfoyle said. “I’m happy with our life and if you don’t want to have kids with me, I won’t mention it again.”

  
“I really do love you,” Dinesh said, curling up to him.

  
“I know, baby,” Gilfoyle assured him, petting him.

  
“I feel like this whole thing came out so harsh. I’m such an asshole,” Dinesh said.

  
“We wouldn’t be a good couple if you weren’t, babe. It’s okay,” Gilfoyle said as he kept petting him.

 

 

 

It was sixteen years later. Dinesh answered the door to see Melissa standing there. When she saw it was him answering, she frowned and said, “Oh. Crap!”

  
He stared at her.

  
“Is Gilfoyle home?” she asked.

  
“Uh...yeah,” he said.

  
“I wanted to talk to him. Just him,” she said, looking down and twitching nervously. It always freaked Dinesh out seeing how she acted just liker her dads when she was nervous.

  
“I’m not really comfortable with that mysterious request...” Dinesh said as Gilfoyle walked over.

  
“What’s going on?” he asked.

 

  
“Can I talk to you alone?” she asked.

  
Gilfoyle nodded and immediately stepped out. As he closed the door behind him, Dinesh called out, “Cool. I’ll just be inside thinking about how super normal it is for my husband to need secret meetings with a teenage girl.”

  
“What’s going on, Melissa?” Gilfoyle asked.

  
“I need a morning after pill,” she told him. “You have to be over 18 to buy it.”

  
He nodded and silently led her to his car. As they drove, he asked, “Do your dads no where you are?” When he saw how guilty she looked, he said, “I don’t care about you sneaking around, I’d just like to know if they’re going to file a missing persons report on the underage girl in my car.”

  
“Last night I told them I was at my friend Jessica’s and they still think I’m there. It’s the first time I’d ever lied to them,” she said miserably.

  
“That’s the first time? No wonder you were so sloppy with Dinesh. You were acting so weird, you might as well have told him.”

  
“What would you have done?” she asked.

  
“Say that I just stopped by for directions because the GPS in my car wasn’t working then asked Dinesh for a soda and while he was out of the room, tell me about the pill situation.”

  
“...that’s pretty good.”

  
“I started lying to my parents way before age sixteen,” he said. 

  
She teared up. “I try really hard to be good. I do.” She started crying.

  
“It’s okay,” he told her. “You’re still good.”

  
“Really?” she asked. “Oh my gosh, thank you. That’s why I came to you. I know my dads would hate me for this.”

  
Gilfoyle parked and said, “I’m going to park here and go to a pharmacy a few blocks away because I’m gonna have to tell them this is for my girlfriend and then I don’t really want them to see me get into a car with an underage girl. I’ll be right back, okay?”

  
She nodded.

  
Before he left, he looked at her one more time and said, “You did not do anything wrong. Don’t beat yourself up.”

  
He came back with the pill and a bottle of cranberry juice. She smiled and said, “You remembered what kind of juice I like.”

  
“Yeah, of course. You’re one of the three people I like on the planet.”

  
She smiled at him before she took the pill.

  
“It could possibly make you nauseous or feverish so you might not want to go home for a while. Knowing Jared, he’d take you to a hospital right away and then he’d find out everything.”

  
“You didn’t even have to read the side effects,” she noticed.

  
“You are not the first girl I’ve had to do this for,” he said. He started driving her back to his place.

  
“How many girls have you...not gotten pregnant?” she asked.

  
“A couple,” he said. “And once when I was your age, my girlfriend had to get an abortion.” 

She looked at him with surprise.

  
“I’ve never really talked to anyone about it, but I just want you to know. You seem like you’re feeling pretty guilty, like you’re the only person who’s ever screwed up. Trust me, you’re not.”

  
“Thanks,” she said. “But, I still feel bad.” She let out a breath and said, “But, it won’t happen again. I’m never having unprotected sex again. It was so stupid.”

  
“Do you... want to talk about what happened?" he asked. 

  
“I was just really scared that my boyfriend would break up with me if I didn’t have sex with him,” she said. Gilfoyle glared and Melissa recoiled. “Are you mad at me?” she asked.

  
“No!” he said quickly. “I’m mad at this fucking guy. I’m gonna punch him in the fucking face. I’m not mad at you, though. I did the exact same thing in high school.”

  
“Really?” she asked.

  
“Yeah...I was totally straight edge until I met this girl...she was so out of my league. I felt like I had to do so much to impress her. I changed everything about myself, did stuff I was really uncomfortable with and she still ended up breaking my heart. And then I did the exact same thing with like five or six more people before finally realizing that maybe I shouldn’t change myself for people.”

  
She thought about that and then quietly said, “I’m really scared that another cool guy will never like me.”

  
“I get that,” he said. “I’m actually fucking freaked out having flashbacks thinking about how much I get that. But, I hope you’ll decide that it’s not worth doing things you don’t want to do or that you’re going to feel bad about just for someone else’s approval.”

  
When he’d parked, he said, “You can hang out here but I don’t really know what we could tell Dinesh besides the truth. Are you okay telling him?”

  
“Do you think he’d tell my dads?”

  
“He’d try not to if I told him not to. But he’s not that good at lying.”

  
She sighed and looked like she might start crying again.

  
“You know, I don’t totally get why you’re so scared of telling them.”

  
“I’ve never disappointed them like this before,” she said.

  
“Why do you think they’ll be disappointed?”

  
“It’s just how things have always been. All this pressure to be smart and buckled down and always do the right thing...”

  
“I don’t think they mean it to be pressure,” Gilfoyle said. “I know your dads expect the world from you but it’s just because they think you’re amazing. They always have and I think they always will. I know from personal experience what parents who’ll completely turn on you for your mistakes are like and I don’t see it with your dads. But, it’s up to you. I’ll take any secret you tell me to my grave.”

  
She nodded and sat there, crying a little while she thought about it.

 

 

 

When they entered the house, Dinesh asked Gilfoyle, “What the fuck is going on?”

  
“It’s okay, baby. I can tell you everything. Melissa is about to call her dads. Let’s go into the bedroom and leave her alone while she does that.”

 

 

“...she came right to you,” Dinesh said, after Gilfoyle explained everything. “I don’t think there’s a single person on earth who would come to me first in a crisis.”

  
“She just wanted someone who she knows wouldn’t judge her,” he said. “And I won’t. And if either of those malnourished nerds that raised her tries to make her feel like this makes her a bad person, I will rip apart their fucking souls.”

  
“You really love her,” Dinesh observed. “You always have, haven’t you?”

  
Gilfoyle shrugged. “She’s the closest thing I have to a daughter.”  Melissa popped her head in. She smiled at Gilfoyle through tears and said, “You were right. They don’t hate me. They just said that next time I should come straight to them, not try to hide it from them.”

  
Gilfoyle nodded and said, “I knew they’d never push you away.”

  
When Melissa went back to the living room, Dinesh asked, “Do you think we’re too old to have kids? I mean, did we miss the boat and now we’d be the weird old guys who everyone assumes are grandparents when we’re at their high school graduation?”

  
Gilfoyle tilted his head. “No. It’s not too late...why? Are you thinking about it?”

  
Dinesh nodded. Gilfoyle wrapped his arm around him tightly. “I’m so glad I married you,” he said.

  
“I’m so glad I married you too,” Dinesh told him.


End file.
